A little about why I am doing this...

So, I have shared with you a little bit about the greater cause I am hiking for (raising funds for research and treatment of leukemia and lymphoma), but now I would like to tell you about the reason that is personal and individualized to me for participating in the Zion Hike.

I am soon to be 25-years-old and recently graduated with my Master of Social Work. The past two years have been intense, and in a really wonderful way. I have had the opportunity to expand my mind and understanding on several topics and meet some of the most amazing people! For any of you who have been through post-graduate training you know that your mental muscles get a mighty fine work out, but sometimes that can mean the muscles below your neck get a little...oh, let's say neglected. Now, I am proud of myself because I actually toned up a little in grad school and was dedicated to walking my dog daily and going to the gym on a regular basis. But, I in no way have challenged myself physically as I have challenged myself mentally. Another reason for this lack of physical challenge is because of something that happened in February of 2010 and has greatly contributed to me wanting to complete this hike.

In 2010 I had been having constant back pain for almost a year and in true 'grin and bear it' style refused to go to the doctor. Suddenly, while I was babysitting, my back totally gave out when I reached for a toy for one of the kiddos. I couldn't bend over at all. It didn't matter if I was sitting, standing, or lying down, the pain was persistent and excruciating. After 2 MRIs and a myriad of other tests I was diagnosed with a herniated disk between L4 & L5 vertebrae and also with a strange condition called syringomyelia. (Now if you go look that up you are going to get freaked out and thankfully WebMD's description is nothing like what I am experiencing now.)

The combination of the pain I was in and the diagnosis I had received was quite a blow to my self-esteem and also to my view of my body and it's ability. What has only recently come into consciousness for me is that during this time, and really up until the past few months, I grew to distrust my body and feel that it controlled my circumstances more than I did. I was also quite embarrassed to have mobility issues at 23. "Isn't this the time in my life where I am supposed to be able to move at my prime?" I thought. My physical therapist encouraged me to only walk any distance if I had my tennis shoes on and to not engage in any type of strenuous exercise, so no running, jogging, hiking, yoga, pilates, etc. For over a year I followed her rules and kept my exercise and movement minimal.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I felt disgusting and just hated being in so much pain all of the time. I started going to the gym without her permission, but stuck to the elliptical since the impact is so low. Then, I took a chance on a meditation technique that is supposed to help with lots of health related issues and almost instantly began to feel a positive difference!! After almost two years of hurting and not feeling confident in my body's ability I could run and challenge myself in the gym in ways I didn't think I would be able to do again. The pain I had been experiencing for almost 2 years straight almost completely dissipated! I felt like a new woman!! Around this same time my roommate signed up to run in the Rock n' Roll San Diego Marathon. I watched her get up every Saturday and run in Forest Park, adding on mile after mile, and all the while stay dedicated to this amazing organization and cause! As I continued to feel better, she continued to run and inspire me that maybe someday I could do something similar.

In June I had the privilege of being at the marathon with her and it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life (not to mention hers)! When we got back home I mentioned to her that I wished there was a Team in Training type program for people who like to hike. Rosie just smiled and said, "Well, there is! It's called Team in Training!" I signed up as quickly as I could and now here I am!

I don't expect this training to be easy and I think there will be days I wonder why in the world I am getting up at 5 am to go hike 13 miles in the middle-of-no-where Missouri, but then I will remember that each day is a gift and I am so thankful to be able to move and challenge my mind and my body, especially since for a time I didn't think that was an option. Of course, as stated earlier, the greater cause of this hike is for research and finding a cure for leukemia and lymphoma, but as with most of the individuals I know who either hike or run a marathon or do the triathalon, we have our individual reasons, too. Many people I am hiking with have lost loved ones to a blood cancer or have themselves fought cancer and are now in remission. I don't want to compare my situation, because, really, there is no comparison to losing a loved one to cancer or fighting cancer personally. What I do want to say is that I am so thankful that I am in a place where I can hike a mountain and that with each step I take, both in the training process and on the official hike day, I will be doing it first for those whose lives have been touched by cancer and secondarily, for myself as I regain an appreciation for my body's ability and take an opportunity to challenge myself because I can.